Thursday, February 4, 2010

Brush with Celebrity

Brush with Celebrity

So I'm in LA on business, hanging at the bar in the Plaza. Some co-drones and I are just sipping our way over-priced drinks, hashing over the days mind-numbing presentations and bitching as only drones can. When out of the corner of my bleary eye, I notice this little guy trying very hard not to be noticed. Ball cap pulled down, slouched down on the bar stool, no eye contact...you know the drill. About as subtle as the Carmen Sandiego disguise.
After a quick huddle with the co-drones, we decide he's the actor who played the obnoxious older brother on "Wonderful Life"...that Fred Savage launch vehicle. If you are under 30, ask your mom. No one can remember his character's name, let alone his real one, so we take the prudent course of keeping him under observation without blowing his awful attempt at disguise. Perhaps a poor president to set considering what followed.
Deep into our second or third round, another B-lister rolled into view. Some sit-com character actor who we recognized, but again could not name joined celeb 1 at the bar. Looked a bit like Newman from Seinfeld, but not. In any event, Not-Newman and celeb 1 struck up a conversation, while apparently waiting for the next Hollywood has-been to complete their trio. Leaving us no hint of what was to come.
Within a few minutes, the heavens opened, choirs sang and from somewhere a subtle spotlight landed on a familiar platinum haired behemoth of a man as he strolled up to his mates at the bar. Sleeveless muscle shirt, fresh dew-rag, bulging muscles...yes, all you ECW fans...HULK HOGAN bellied up to the bar, not 3 feet from your humble author.
The co-drones were shocked into gape-mouthed silence. leaving me alone to confront our A-lister as he took in the scene with steeley eyes and ordered a beer. For a moment, as he thanked the nonplussed barkeep, our eyes briefly met. What happened then, I can only blame on the liquid courage in me, as I suavely nodded and said...."Hey."
Perhaps thankful that a pen and napkin were not being shoved under his nose, perhaps just as part of his humanity, he responded with a quiet, "How ya doin'?" A four word exchange, meaningless to him, but a great story for this country bumpkin to pass on to friends.